Sunny Summer

                                             

Walkies :)

Walk in sunshine

what these yellow flowers called?

I don't care what people say..

Just because i have a child doesn't mean I'm not entitled to have some fun, I'm not causing harm to anyone but myself yes i go out drinking to clubs and bars but its not like i don't see my daughter the most im gone is 6 days a month, im still young, i like to party i like to drink and i like to dance its not like im going back with random strangers and sleeping around like some people my age, I'm with one person and don't really see the issue in going out once in a while, i always return home to bed, i wake up the next morning the only harm im doing to myself is drinking and putting myself in danger thats why i go to safe places like clubs there are bouncers to stop crap having, its better than a house party and alot safer. So to everyone who thinks its 'bad' i go out so much well im sorry I'm not going to change for anyone, would they rather me sit at home and be sad and bored, keep your crap thoughts to yourself and get a freaking life instead of being involved in mine.

I Sometimes miss you.

This is kind off dedicated to my old bestfriend. I don't even know if she still reads my blog or not/maybe just my private one.
Basically its been a few years since i've spoken to you. I miss our crazy times, the times we would be on the phone to midnight and the time we found our teachers mobile number and pranked call him. I loved going round yours having our mini partys every weekend, having our little compitions who can get the most pissed & our other little game (Which will always be a secrete hahaa). The times your dad kicked us out when he came in from the pub, we just run up to the park with a bottle of booze. However our friendship wasn't all that good, suppose we just caused trouble for each other like the time we threated the shop keeper he called the police, you ran got away and they got me or the times when we literally crawled onto the trains from getting absoulty wrecked and pegging it off at any random stop the ticket guys came since you gone i haven't touched drugs. I suppose cutting you out my life was one of the hardest things i ever did but the best. When i look at you i think what i waste you've ruined your life, your literally always on something. I suppose back in the day we where just getting away from everything in which had happened in our life suppose not in the best way but the only way messed up kids knew. I Know we both been through shit, but back stabbing me the way you did just messed with my head. I will never speak to you again or even dream of speaking to you. Your out off my life. I just want you to release i miss you but the old you.

We've Moved!

I really should have updated this ages ago but i just haven't had time or internet (apart from on my phone). It's weird actually moving out buying everything like all the stupid little things which you don't take into account. So its been a long drawn out process but I'm happy to say we've finally got our place and enjoying it so far. I'm not officially meant to be living here until I'm 16 but I'm staying about 3 nights a week and Sam is just working up in Oxfordshire making as much money as possible until he gets a job down here for the summer. But our life is just coming together perfectly.

We've wrote a list together to make sure we don't forget anything or don't buy the same things. The other day we did a big shop in ASDA which is total came to £320... just to tell everyone that wasn't all on food. I can be a fatty but not that much. We bought some bedding, plates, trays, pans.ect... & food obviously. Moving is alot more expensive than what i first thought. At the moment we're just splitting everything in half.

So now i have finally got internet i will try to come on here to just update my blog.

One of my silly little lists. 

Picture for the front room. IM IN LOVE WITH IT!! 

Step mummas!

Up to my mums this weekend, spending time with my little girl. Suppose I’m kind off excited, nervous, scared pretty much every emotion that’s possible. If we don’t spend time with each other I suppose we’re be fine and on the plus side my sisters coming as well and she hates the ‘evil’ step mum more than me so It’s cool but then again I don’t want things to be bad. On Sunday its going to be a year since we last saw our dad, but I don’t really want to go into that, right now. Maybe on a later date.

I’ve bought everyone a little present nothing special, bought my step brothers some food, lol a safe option for 3 boys, my full brother, a new game for the Wii, My step mum some flowers and chocolates, writing that it sounds romantic flowers and chocolates, I’m going to eat the chocolates though, My sister a dress from newlook and Rebecca some summer cloths, thinking about it I should of really thought through the summer cloths its been raining for a week And my dad a lantern to put on his grave.

Anyhow just a short update on life.

Rebecca – Is going to nursery 2 ½ days a week still but at a different nursery this one is a bit bigger but all the girls are lovely. Only thing its £68 a day, so we try and keep it to a minume.  There are more expensive ones and cheaper ones don’t get me wrong but it’s where ever you feel your child can grow, enjoy going each day and safety. She’s walking around and generally happy baby! Always got a big grin on her face.

Rebecca’s daddy - Her father is getting back into her life a little more I guess, however he keeps accusing me off taking drugs when I haven’t touched any which is pretty rich coming from him… He doesn’t work, go to college or is even bothered to get a job and support his daughter until he steps up I don’t really see him being the father figure in her life. He sends texts every day to me pretty much asking how we both are but then again that could just be so that I actually talk to him, we haven’t spoken on the phone just through texting.

Me – I suppose a few things have changed I’m back into home tuition the joys, it could be worse though. Just preparing for exams which I don’t really have much confidence in; if I say myself I’ll be lucky to get a ‘C’ I haven’t put my all into the exams my belief is that I got a job, I’m making more than any of the teachers, I don’t want to go to college, I don’t want to go UNI, I just want to start my own business with my family backing and help children/teenagers who have been through hard times in their life that’s my aim for 5 years’ time. Watch this space. Ha-ha.

Take care everyone

Love

Jess & Rebecca & Samual. <3 

looking for places to move too is stressful

Its been that we would move away when im 16. Sitting here last year planning on where and how we wanted it to be. Even looking at furniture for our house/flat but now its pretty much 3 months to my birthday its become even more stressful; estate agents just don't have anything which we both agree on. In some way i feel like i owe Sam to actually choose on what the place looks like with him moving away from where he has always lived, his friends and family. Him going back to college and me working; its not exactly going to be ideal for one or two years. Him being 19 when we actually move just seems like im taking away his years from him, but then again he's different from other boys, he doesn't feel the need to go out drinking/clubbing he doesn't really follow a crowd like most boys what seems to be these days to shag as many girls as possible. He respects girls. Most people are calling us dumb to actually go rent a house/flat but then they don't know we can't physically be together any possible way, his parents don't like girls around there house and Dan's house has never been permanent only been a short time soulition, we know about the bills- gas, electric,water,insurance and everything else, things will be tight theres no point in denying that.

We've looked around 6 properties in London and several which have connecting rail line to London as that's where my work is. However everything we seem to view just either seems too small or too large for what we're looking for (also one in a horrible area). I viewed a 4 bedroom new build house today, quite exicted in the price range, connecting rail line to london, got there the first room the agent showed me was the kitchen which was huge, which had been refurbished recently and built in fridge freezer, then she showed me the garden which for a new build was decent and had a patio, then the study,dinning/play room, then the living room it was small compared to the kitchen but was fine it could fit a sofa and tv in. We went upstairs she showed me the master room which had a en-suit - the room looked lovely then i went into the master room the paper onto of the shower was basically peeling off and moss growing on the tiles and not to mention the 1800's plastic sink, i carried on looking around so she took me into a tiny box room what could barely fit a bed which had damp in the corner when i pointed it out to the agent she said the landlords will look into that. Carried on looking around into anther room which was claimed as a 'suit' walked in there was a random door a tiny room with a mirror in and straight through was bedroom with anther en-suit suffering from the same problem the last room what was a good single was once again had the same problems. I left and told the agent ill get back to her. We would most likely off rented that as it was available from the time we would start getting furniture if it was a few hundred cheaper and suffering from damp. Anyhow thought ill give you an insight.

Everything else in life seems too be good looking foward to spending tomorrow with Rebecca and seeing Sam Friday. Hope everyone is well.

Love
Jess, Sam & Rebecca

thought i'd actually update this blog!!

well where do i start!
thing are pretty sweet at the moment everything seems to be falling into the place but this is life things can go great for 10 weeks then go crap for 20 weeks.
I don't really use the computure much any-more hence why i don't update my blogs. My phone does it all! I have twitter and Facebook for people who I have met on-line. The Facebook includes pictures of Rebecca and myself and when i get to know you or if i already know you ill change the settings so you can see.
Facebook - http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002861971125
Twitter - https://twitter.com/#!/Jessicaaa_Ox3

if you want to talk more and see pictures blah blah.

Road up to my step mothers looks peaceful had to get a picture.

the dogs i looked after!